From Texting A Lot Of Women, I’ve Learned These Tips Work Consistently
When I started becoming better at talking to women, building attraction, and getting phone numbers, I kind of went crazy with it – like I do a lot of things.
That’s how I learn.
And since then, over the last 10 years, I’ve texted, easily, over a thousand women.
During the course of texting all of those women, I made a lot of mistakes but I also discovered a lot of things that work great and much better than what most guys do.
EVERYTHING I’ve learned about texting women is in my eBook Texting Titan! but for now, here are 10 tips to get you started.
1. Know Your Goal Of Texting Her
Every single time you text her or reply, it’s important to have a goal in mind.
You can’t just blindly text with no end goal.
When I text women, most of the time, it’s to set up a time and date to hang out with them.
Text her, make some small talk for a few minutes, see how she’s doing, see if she’s available to hang out at a certain time and place, and then shut it down.
Your goal SHOULD be to get her on a date and to hang out with her in person – not to have a texting relationship with her.
It shouldn’t be just to “chat” and to kill time.
When you decide you want to see her, text back and forth for a few minutes, tell her you want to hang out, and end it right there.
Tell her you’ll see her then.
If she says she can’t, then tell her “another time then” and STILL end the conversation.
2. Don’t Text Her Too Much
Instead of setting up the date and getting out, many of us want to hang around and keep texting with her.
We want to “hang on” to that conversation as long as possible and make something “happen” with it.
The logical part of your brain says that the more you text her, the more she’ll like you and the more ground you’ll gain with her.
But experience teaches you that too much texting can lead to her being bored and less excited to see you.
Avoid making the mistake of texting her too much and dragging out text conversations for as long as you can.
3. Make Your Texts Short, Quick, And To The Point
Not only should you make the entire text conversation short, quick, and to the point, but you should also make your individual text messages the same way.
Don’t use 50 words when 7 will do.
It’s annoying to have to read all of it.
Keep your text messages short, but also avoid sounding like a robot.
There’s nothing more annoying than “At store. Call back” because it’s so impersonal and robotic.
Your texts don’t have to be THAT short.
“At the store. I’ll call you back” works just fine.
If she says, “wyd”, don’t reply back with, “Just went on a great run. It’s so nice outside! I’m really making some progress! I’m going to take a shower, make some food, probably listen to some music. What about you?”
Instead, say something like, “Just got back from a run. About to shower and then eat. You?”
Same message, less cheesy, more normal sounding, and less of a headache for her to read.
4. Mirror Her Timing And Texts
I learned this one just from sitting down, staring at my phone, and looking at the text conversations I’ve had with women.
Not reading the texts, but just looking at them and getting a visual of the balance taking place.
I discovered that the text conversations that didn’t lead to a lot of attraction were aesthetically imbalanced – my text bubbles were bigger than hers because I was saying more and she took a lot more time to reply to texts than I took.
Everything was off.
On the other hand, the text conversations that were nearly perfect and led to us hanging out looked much different – the bubbles were similar sizes because I was matching the volume of words she was using, the timing was balanced because I was matching her timing, and everything was more “symmetrical”.
Everything was more balanced.
When you text more often or more words than she does, it creates an imbalance.
The person with the least power in the text conversation is usually texting more words and creating more messages than the person with the most power.
Pay attention to it.
Keep the power balanced.
If you use more words than her, send more messages, text more often, and reply faster than she does, you’re, more than likely, giving your power away to her.
You’re giving her power OVER you – which is what she doesn’t want.
The more power you give away to her, the less she enjoys texting with you.
The power you’re giving away is the power you NEED to attract her and keep her attracted – something you’ll learn in my eBooks How to Quit Being a Loser With Women and How Attracting Women Really Works.
When you lose this power, you lose the attraction.
When you lose the attraction, you lose her.
If she uses 7 – 10 words in her text message, try to mirror it.
It’s ok to use less, but not more.
If she takes 3 minutes to reply to your text, don’t reply within 5 seconds.
Again, keep it balanced and mirrored.
Take 2-4 minutes to reply, just like she’s doing.
When you text back RIGHT AWAY and she doesn’t even have time to look away from her phone, it’s painfully obvious that you’re way more excited texting her than she is texting you.
If she takes 20 minutes because she’s supposedly “busy”, do the same.
5. Avoid Getting Overly Excited
It’s totally OK if you’re overly excited to talk to her, just don’t let her know about it.
Don’t communicate it with your words, messages, and timing.
It comes off as weird and a little creepy if it seems you have nothing better to do than to hold your phone, stare at your screen, and wait for her to reply.
Chill out, calm down, be cool, keep your composure, and relax.
The last thing you want her to say is “WTF is up with this dude? He’s a little too excited to be texting me right now.”