Getting Her Number Shouldn’t Be Hard, Scary, or Difficult
When it comes to getting a woman’s phone number, many of us hesitate and bounce the idea back and forth in our brain so much that we become full of anxiety and we’re a nervous wreck when we ask, “Hey uh, can I have your number?” or “Is it ok if I get your number?”
I used to be like this all the time!
Like I was asking a celebrity for their autograph.
But does getting her phone number always have to be this hard and nerve-racking?
It should be simple, quick, and second nature.
It shouldn’t be as intense as disarming a bomb.
So taking from what I’ve learned from getting hundreds of women’s phone numbers over the years, I’ve compiled 10 ways of making getting her number much easier, faster, simpler, and less painful.
1. NEVER “Ask” For Her Phone Number
In How to Quit Being a Loser With Women AND 99 Bad Boy Traits, you’ll learn fast that “asking” for permission or asking “is it ok?” questions doesn’t cause her to see you as more attractive and it can actually do the opposite – it can kill the attraction.
When you ask “Can I?” or “Is it OK?”, she unconsciously senses and “knows” that you’re the type of guy who needs permission.
She senses that there’s a good chance you’re desperately afraid of losing or not getting her approval.
This isn’t what she’s naturally and “wired” to be attracted to.
“Asking” for her phone number puts the ball in her court, gives her the upper hand, puts you in a submissive position, and it gives your power away to her.
Now she can hold this power over your head and EASILY SHUT YOU DOWN without giving it a second thought – because YOU gave her that power by asking for permission.
Asking for permission = giving her your power
The more power you give her (by doing things that aren’t attractive), the less attraction she feels to you.
The more power you keep for yourself by not giving it away, the MORE attraction she’ll ultimately feel.
When you seek permission from her to get her phone number, you’re giving her your power and she’s using your power to easily tell you “no”.
Never give her the chance to use your power against you.
Keep it for yourself by not seeking permission and not “asking” for her phone number by using “can I?” or “is it ok?” stuff.
She doesn’t want that power you’re giving her when you ask for her number and she doesn’t want to use it against you.
2. Tell Her to Give You Her Phone Number
Instead of asking, tell her to give it to you
That’s right – TELL HER to give you her number.
But of course not in a weird, controlling, dramatic, psycho, or creepy way.
Say, “Hey it’s been fun chatting and you seem like a pretty awesome person. Give me your number and we’ll chat later.”
Right in the middle of your conversation or interaction with her, at a point she least expects it, just say, “Hey real quick, give me your number.”
Don’t explain yourself.
Don’t say, “If it’s ok with you…”
Act completely normal about it.
Then when she gives it to you, go right back to whatever you and her were talking about.
The more normal you act, the more normal she’ll be about it.
This works because she’s not expecting you to ask for her number at that moment and since she’s caught off guard, she’s more likely to just go with it.
She’s not anticipating you asking for it so she doesn’t have an excuse or defense ready (if she’s planning on telling you “no”).
See the difference?
“Asking” gives away your power to her and she can use against you if she chooses to.
But telling or “commanding” her communicates that YOU’RE IN CHARGE AND TAKING THE LEAD.
It communicates you’re not afraid to AT ALL to go for what you want.
She wants this and she’s much more likely to say, “Yea sure. That’d be great.”
3. Say “What’s Your Number?”
In the middle of chatting with her or when you’re leaving, instead of asking for her number or even telling her to give you hers, just say “What’s your number?” as cool, casual, and calm as possible.
Don’t even make it sound like a question.
Make it sound more like a sentence.
Make it sound like you’re telling her to give you her number, but you’re phrasing it into a question/command.
Don’t put the question-like tone on it.
Say it as if you’re 100% sure she’s going to give it to you.
The more calm, cool, casual, and “whatever” you are about it, the more likely she’ll be to not even think twice about it.
4. Just Give Her Your Phone Number
Giving her YOUR phone number communicates that you’re very CONFIDENT and NOT AFRAID of rejection.
It also means you’re taking all the risk, you’re communicating that you’re the prize, and you’re aware of the chance that she may forget about or not call you.
When you GIVE her YOUR NUMBER, it tells her all the right things – including that you’re confident and not afraid of rejection. She finds this very attractive.
Also, it communicates to her that YOU’RE NOT NEEDY and if she doesn’t call, it’s no big deal.
Personally, if I give her my number and she never contacts me, she’s the one who made the mistake, not me.
My mindset is that it’s her loss, I’m a great guy, and she’s missing out.
You also need to have this same mindset when you give women your number.
Giving her your phone number also saves you time, energy, and effort.
If she takes your number and you don’t hear from her, you’re not wasting your time trying to contact someone who isn’t interested in you anyways.
So how is it done?
I like to say, “Hey I hate to cut you short, it’s been fun chatting, but unfortunately I gotta run. I’m glad we became friends though. Take my number, call me or text me, and we’ll chat later.”
Then get her phone and put your number in it or simply tell her to put your number in her phone.
Say, “Here’s my number, you ready?”
Don’t ASK if she wants to take your number!
Don’t ask permission to give her your number!
Just give it to her.
If she refuses, which rarely happens, just brush it off, be indifferent about it, and say, “Ok that’s cool too” and walk away.
Don’t write your name and number on a napkin or paper unless it’s absolutely necessary and don’t call your phone from hers unless she knows you’re doing it.
The good thing about giving her your number is she’s more likely to say, “OK let me call you right now so you can have my number too.”
5. Say “Let’s Exchange Numbers”
Something about “let’s exchange numbers” feels safer, friendlier, and less risky to women.
From what I can remember, I don’t believe I’ve ever had been told “no” to this one.
She’ll usually say, “Sounds great!” or “sure!”
When you’re about to leave or you’re saying bye, just say, “Before I go, let’s exchange numbers”.
Works like a charm every time.
6. Say “Text Me”
If I’m short on time and I really have to go, I’ll tell her, “Hey I gotta run, text me”.
Say it as if there’s no doubt in your mind that she’s going to text you.
Then if she’s taking too long, I’ll say, “Here. What’s your number? I’ll send you a text.”
Then AS SOON as I get it, I’ll walk away and send a text that says, “It’s Marc. Save my number.”
Then I’ll text her back and forth a few times, tell her I have to go (again), and I’ll set up a time and date to see her again.
Know When To Stop and Back Off
When getting her phone numbers, weird things happen so be ready for anything.
If she says, “Oh, I’d love to but I don’t have a phone” or anything else that sounds “made up”, just say, “Ok” and WALK AWAY. DO NOT waste your time trying to write your number down for her.
The reason I say to walk away is because if she really doesn’t have a phone and SHE REALLY IS INTERESTED in talking to you, she’ll say something like, “Oh I’d love to but I don’t have a phone… Here write it down for me so I can have it here.”
OR she’ll simply give you HER number.
If it becomes complicated and sketchy, walk away and forget about her because the headache isn’t worth your time.
If you tell her to give you her number and she says, “Let me have yours instead”, DON’T DO IT. Walk away. The deal is off.
This is something women often do as a defense mechanism to get guys they don’t like to GO AWAY.
So don’t be a sucker and fall for it.
Just move on and forget about it.
REMEMBER, as you’ll learn in How to Quit Being a Loser With Women, women are Picasso’s of making up excuses to get men they aren’t interested in to go away.
If you suspect she’s making an excuse, lying, or trying to get you to go away, then stop right there and get away from the situation.
Don’t Lie or Be Manipulative To Get Her Number
Last, when getting her phone number or giving her yours, it’s best not to be manipulative in any kind of way.
Women know when you’re being genuine and when you’re not.
Don’t play games or be dishonest.
Just be straightforward and direct about it.
Be straightforward with your intentions.
Women will appreciate you for it.
Funny Video: Getting Numbers Without Talking
Thanks For Reading,
– Marc Summers