how to be hard to get challenge mysterious - featured

How to Be Harder to Get, Mysterious, and a Challenge – 9 Smart Ways

Share this article with friends

Share on facebook
Share on twitter
Share on reddit
Share on linkedin
Share on pinterest
Share on email

Get This Book:


We’re Not a Challenge Because We Think Easier Is Better

Being logical minded, we often make the mistake of thinking if we are less of a challenge, she’s more likely to want to be with us. We think if we’re picker, harder to get, and more of a challenge, she won’t want anything to do with us because there’s work involved in getting to know us -but the opposite is true.

Women like men who are harder to get and more of a challenge. When we’re too easy, women find it boring because it’s no fun and they don’t have to work for it.

Not Being a Challenge Can Come Off as Desperate and Needy

When you communicate, “Here I am! No work involved! Come and get me!”, she unconsciously thinks you’re desperate, needy, and you’ll settle for anyone. She doesn’t want just anyone. She wants a man who’s picky and she wants to know she’s good enough for him and she meets his standards. She wants to beat other women to the punch and claim you because you’re more of an “in demand” guy.

Women Are Competitive By Nature

If you think men are competitive, spend time with women who don’t know each other well – or even sisters!

Women are competitive, cruel, and will practically kill each other to get ahead. It’s always a competition with them.

Getting the guy another woman wants or seeing another woman NOT GET what she wants gives some women the ultimate satisfaction.
Women are just as competitive, or even more competitive than men – they’re just better at not drawing attention to it.
Women are territorial, vindictive, and will step on other women to get what and where they want.

So if some “bitch” is getting more attention from the guy who’s mysterious and more of a challenge, she’ll go out of her way to get his attention. She doesn’t want the guy all the women ignore – she wants the guy that’s getting all of the attention. They who’s more of a challenge and harder to get! The guy that is “worth” having!

Women LOVE and WANT Mysterious, Hard to Get, and Challenging Guys

Women’s unconscious “wiring” tells them that easy to get and “open book” guys are less valuable than more mysterious, challenging, and harder to get guys.
If you’re more mysterious and challenging than most guys and not throwing yourself at women, they naturally feel more attraction for you and want to get to know you.

  • Women avoid guys who throw themselves at them.
  • Women don’t fantasize about being with men who are extremely easy to get.
  • Women don’t feel as much attraction for guys who aren’t picky and selective.

You need to become pickier when it comes to the women you date and don’t settle for just anyone. Figure out exactly what type of woman you want and design your mindset and behavior around attracting only that type of woman into your life.

Here are 9 ways to do it:


1. Stop Putting Her on a Pedestal

Unconsciously, we put women on a pedestal and seek their approval because we want to get laid or make them our girlfriend.

You don’t need to do this. Stop caring what women think about you. Stop worrying about what they say about you. If you make yourself happy and you know you’re doing what’s right, that’s all that matters.

You can be more mysterious and more of a challenge if you don’t give her the pleasure of having you wrapped around her finger.
When you put women on a pedestal, they automatically look down on you.
Raise your standards, don’t bow down to women, and kiss your own ass (if you’re flexible enough).

2. Don’t be Available 24/7

When you’re too easy to reach, your value decreases. Guys who don’t stop what they’re doing to answer their phone, who take forever to call and text back, and are hard to reach have a higher value in women’s eyes.

The more challenging it is to reach you, the more women want to talk to you!

Think about it:

99% of the guys she meets are waiting by their phone for her to call or text or they’re blowing up her phone wanting to take her out on a date. But the 1% of guys she’s really interested in are the ones who don’t always answer, don’t always call and text back right away, and are more mysterious and challenging than most guys.
The guy waiting by his phone for her to call or text doesn’t make her feel as much attraction as the guy who makes her wait to talk to him.
If you’re busy, don’t stop what you’re doing to talk to her. MAKE HER WAIT FOR YOU. If she gets upset because you didn’t answer, then she’s probably a low-quality woman you want to avoid dating anyway.

3. Stop Calling and Texting So Often

The guy who predictably calls all the time is in danger of her thinking he’s boring, needy, clingy and doesn’t have much of a life.

She wants to talk to the guy who’s more unpredictable. The guy she’s not sure of when he’ll call and text. The guy who isn’t blowing her phone up 24/7. The one who makes her wonder when she’ll hear from him!

In the eBook and Audiobook Texting Titan!, you’ll learn that if you want to be more mysterious and more of a challenge, let her call and text YOU at least 50% of the time. This way, you’re able to gauge exactly how interested she really is or isn’t.

4. Don’t Buy Her Attention, Approval, Affection, or Love

When you use money to persuade her to like you, she will think you’re a lame and pathetic tool. Any attraction she may have once felt will vanish immediately.

Using money to get her attention communicates you’re desperate, immature, lacking personal pride and standards, not a challenge, and too easy to get.

When you’re more mysterious, challenging, and picker, you don’t feel the need to give women money or buy their attention.
Attraction is the most important element of dating and it can’t be bought with money.
Keep your money in your pocket and show her your true value by not being as easy as other men.

5. Never “Need” Anyone or Anything

Guys who are desperate to fall in love or desperate for a relationship scare women away faster than a guy with a mask and a machete.

Being more mysterious and more of a challenge means you don’t “need” anyone or anything. You’re happy when you’re single and happy in a relationship. It doesn’t make a difference either way.

The guy who’s happy being single makes it harder for women to get him because they have to bring A LOT to the table and prove to the him why she’s worth him changing his relationship status.

Never desperate for attention or a relationship. Co-dependent men scare women away.


6. Don’t Be an Open Book

Keep personal details about yourself and your life out of the picture until you get to know her extremely well and it looks like the relationship is headed in a positive direction. But even then, only reveal a little bit at a time. Don’t tell her your life story within the first week or month of meeting her.

Don’t feel obligated to answer all of her questions all of the time. Just cause she asks doesn’t mean you’re forced to reveal anything. Let her wonder. Let her be curious.

When she’s curious, she’s EXCITED about you. When she’s excited, she’s feeling ATTRACTION.

Keep the mystery. Keep parts of your life private, that are for you only, and that you don’t need to share with women. You’re more attractive to women when you’re selective about what information you share.

7. Stop Seeking Approval

In the eBook and Audiobook How to Quit Being a Loser With Women, you’ll learn that women get more approval from men than they want.

Do you think every guy dishing out approval gets to sleep with her? No way! The guys who are a challenge are the ones getting her attention.
Women run away from the guys constantly giving approval into the arms of guys who are more challenging and give less approval.
This may seem extremely irrational and make no sense, but it’s the way it works.

So stop giving women approval in order to get it in return. They don’t want you to put them on a pedestal or kiss their feet. When you give yourself approval, women are more likely to give you approval as well.

8. To Be a Challenge, Do Things on Your Own Terms

Most guys do what SHE WANTS TO DO – all of the time. They’re afraid she’ll disapprove if they say “no” or do otherwise.

What most guys don’t realize is that most women are natural followers. She doesn’t mind doing what YOU want to do and, in fact, she, more than likely, prefers it.

When you take the lead and do things on YOUR TERMS, she’ll follow. She doesn’t want you to do what she wants to do all the time! It’s no fun and makes her bored.

You’re more of a challenge when you say, “That’s sounds great and all that, but I don’t feel like doing it. We’re going to here and do this thing instead. You ready to go?”

Don’t do everything she wants to just because you think you’re increasing your “chances” with her. She’d rather have the challenge, friction, complexity, and minor drama of you disagreeing with her than for you to concede all of the time and do what she wants.

9. Never Stop Being A Challenge

For as long as you live, date, are married, or whatever happens to you, good or bad, keep being a challenge.

Stay being the guy who doesn’t put women on a pedestal, isn’t too available, doesn’t waste money trying to buy love, isn’t needy and clingy, keeps information to himself, doesn’t give out approval, and does things on his terms.
Women ALWAYS want what they can’t have.
If you’re a challenge and you do it right, she’ll chase you until she gets you or you file a restraining order. Once she has you, if you keep her attracted, she’s yours for as long as you want. Since most guys aren’t as much of a challenge, her chances of finding another guy like you are SLIM – and she knows it.

When you can become more of a challenge, the women you actually want will feel A LOT more long-term attraction for you – something most guys will NEVER have the luxury of experiencing.

Thanks for reading,

– Marc Summers

Get This Book:


Share this article with friends

Share on facebook
Share on twitter
Share on reddit
Share on linkedin
Share on pinterest
Share on email

1 Comment on “How to Be Harder to Get, Mysterious, and a Challenge – 9 Smart Ways

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *



I'm Marc Summers

marc summers of major league dating


dating and relationship advice for men

Dating and Relationship Coaching – via Phone, FaceTime, Skype, Duo, or WhatsApp

masters kit

The Master’s Kit – 25% off ALL eBooks & Audiobooks

woocommerce product how to quit being a loser with women ebook and audiobook

How to Quit Being a Loser with Women – Everything you’re doing wrong and how to fix it

woocommerce how attracting women really works ebook and audiobook

How Attracting Women Really Works 2nd Edition – What to think, do, and say to make women want you as more than just a friend

woocommerce product declare war on yourself ebook and audiobook

Declare War on Yourself – Boost self-esteem and confidence. Become more mature. Attract higher-quality women.

woocommerce product 99 bad boy traits ebook and audiobook

99 Bad Boy Traits – How to quit scaring away with nice behavior

woocommerce product 72 ways to get her back ebook and audiobook

72 Ways to Get Her Back – How to rebuild the attraction and get her back for good

woocommerce product texting titan ebook and audiobook

Texting Titan! – Proven strategies for texting women and creating attraction through text

Free Advice Categories

Top Free Dating Advice

Happy Customers

Doug M
Read More
"I'm 46 now, so I've read/listened to them all including all of Tony Robbins seminars, etc. Declare War is THE ONLY one I need now. It is the only one ANYONE would ever need."
Read More
"You have been quite possibly my favorite teacher in my life. I wish there was a way to repay you. Thank you very much for following your purposes."
Read More
"Keep up the stellar work! You’ve just changed my Life for the better, and I will be sure to turn many others onto your material!"
Read More
"Declare War on Yourself is my new bible. Each page is impactful and a catalyst for changing behavior. No nonsense. Just plain battlefield success principles."
Doug M.
Read More
"Declare War On Yourself is THE ONLY book I need now. It is the only one ANYONE would ever need. I just want to thank you a million times over."
Read More
"I've read hundreds of books and yours is the gem. On my fifth time and it's still just as impactful as the first. This book inspired me enough to send a personal message to you."
Read More
"Marc 's book is the most effective and makes the most sense - and I’ve sought advice from the entire Internet! I’ve even talked to Marc on the phone and he’s the same guy as he is on this audiobook. 100% REAL!"
Read More
"I love Marc’s tough no BS approach to advice on self-improvement. He talks about his own life and lessons that have helped shape him into the man he is today."
Read More
"Honestly other than the Bible, best book I have read in my life in regards to making changes in my life."
Read More
"Thank you so much for what you teach! You don’t understand how much it helped me. You saved my life. I been struggling with this stuff for years. I wish I seen this earlier."