20 Ways To Become A More Mature Man
Becoming More Mature Makes Your Life Easier
Besides attracting women faster and easier, becoming more mature positively impacts every other area of your life – academics, career, social, emotional, relationship, etc. People respond to maturity better than they do immaturity, and in return, life becomes easier for you.
So, to help you grow up a little and feel better about yourself, here are 20 ways to become a more mature:
1. Accept Yourself, People, Situations, and Circumstances
Immature men refuse to accept themsleves the way they are. They refuse to their life, situations, and circumstances. If you suggest that MAYBE they can use some growing up a little, they respond with calling you an idiot and saying you don’t know what you’re talking about.
Maturity is accepting yourself, your circumstances, and everything else. Stop wasting time and energy trying to deny it, change it, or manipulate it.
To Become More Mature, Accept:
2. Be Willing To Change
After accepting that you don’t know everything and you probably have some growing up to do, decide you’re going to make whatever changes are necessary to get better results.
Avoid the immature and closed-minded mindset of “only fake people change”. Those who say “I’m real. I’m not fake” are the ones suffering the most from an immature mindset. They’re having the same thoughts, doing the same things, and getting the same results while they label mature people who are changing, adapting, and getting results as “sellouts” and “fakes”. It’s a loser mindset to have.
Be willing to let go of whatever is holding you back and throw out what isn’t working. Be willing to change what’s broken.
Never hold onto anything too tightly and always be open to changes whenever it means better results and more peace of mind.
3. Get Your “Inner Child” Under Control
No matter how mature you become, a part of you will still want to behave in childish ways and make childish decisions. The difference between being mature and immature is how much you let your “inner child” run the show. Immaturity is letting the childish part of your brain be the boss and call the shots. Maturity is keeping the childish part of your brain in check.
The childish part of your brain never has good intentions and its purpose is to sabotage the results you’re getting.
Maturity is shutting down the childish part of your brain when it’s trying to take over. Maturity is, on a regular basis, choosing to make intelligent and responsible decisions.
4. Lose Your Need For Instant Gratification
Immaturity is wanting everything “now”. It’s the inability to handle boredom and feeling like life sucks or you’ll die if you can’t get what you want right now. If anything takes time to procure, you don’t want it. You want the instant payoff. It’s following what 99% of the population is doing because it’s “easier” and gets faster results. It’s never seeing anything though and as a result, you have a collection of unfinished projects unreached goals.
Maturity is seeing it through no matter how long it takes and how hard it is. You see the goal and make up your mind you’re going to do whatever it takes to reach what’s worth reaching.
Instant gratification is a loser mindset and winners delay gratification for as long as necessary get what they want. As long as you’re instant gratification-minded, you’ll never have the job, financial status, dating life, or life you want because you’re unwilling to be patient and mentally tough.
Be willing to wait it out, work longer and harder, and do what others aren’t doing to have what others don’t and be what they aren’t.
5. Lose The “Smart And Educated” Mindset
Instead of admitting they don’t know it all and they’re still learning, immature people carry around the “I’m smart and educated” mindset. The thought of, “I may not be as smart as other people” is too much for them to handle. They play up their experience, education, and intelligence so others will be in awe of them.
To become more mature, realize it’s foolish to think you’re smarter than everyone just because you finished college and paid a lot of money to learn what is mostly free on the internet. Realize it’s foolish to walk around with the mindset of “I get it and other people don’t. I’m smarter, more experienced, and more educated than most people”.
Lose the need to prove how smart, educated, and better you are. The more you think you know, the less you’re going to learn.
The less you think you know, the more you’ll learn and the smarter you’ll actually become.
6. Put Your Happiness First
Your happiness comes first.
When something is taking away from your happiness and peace of mind, eliminate it or stop doing it. Your happiness and peace of mind is more valuable than money or any other resource. If you’re going out of your way to make someone else happy but it’s making you miserable, stop doing it.
Stop putting the happiness of others over your own so you can get attention, approval, and love from people who probably don’t care that much about you.
Have the mindset of, “My happiness comes first and I will NEVER make myself unhappy trying to make someone else happy.”
7. Stop Wasting Time
Notice I keep saying certain things are a “complete waste of time”? That’s because your time is just as important as your happiness. Your time is more important than money and other resources. Don’t waste it on useless people, activities, and thoughts and behavior.
Constantly ask yourself, “Is this worth my time?” Look at what’s happening in your life and decide if that thought, behavior, activity, or person is actually worth your time or if you could be using your time more wisely.
8. Improve Your Self-Control
Your life is the product of stopping what you’re doing and asking yourself, “Is this a wise decision? Will this decision impact my life negatively? What will be the long-term effects of what I’m about to do?”
Immature people are constantly broke, unhappy, full of regret, full of addictions, overweight, and headed in the wrong direction.
Self-Control is telling yourself “no” if a decision isn’t wise or will have a negative impact on their current situation. It isn’t fun and no matter how painful or boring it is, it’s a necessary tool to get and keep your life on the right track.
9. Get Your Addictions Handled
A lack of self-control breeds dangerous and harmful addictions. These addictions can be watching TV, playing video games, eating, watching porn, masturbating, drinking, doing drugs, gambling, etc. It’s mature to never overdo ANYTHING in your life.
Get your addictions under control and don’t let them control you.
10. Stop Needing Approval
Stop getting on Facebook, Snapchat, and Instagram and posting pictures and making comments for “likes” and approval. Lose the need to prove how cool or better you are through your photos, shares, opinions, and word choices. Stop re-posting other people’s comments and photos as an expression of your own “individuality”. You don’t need everyone to like you and approve of you while you sit motionless staring at your phone or computer and use your fingers to express how cool and unique you are.
Stop caring about approval. It’s a waste of your time.
Social Media isn’t the way people work in real life and people are wasting their time and destroying their brain cells worrying about what their so-called “friends” think.
Start approving of and “liking” yourself. Only worry about what YOU think. Let everyone have their opinion, good or bad, but only take yours seriously – unless the person giving their opinion is very educated, common sensed, and educated.
11. Embrace Self-Discipline
Self-discipline is not a form of punishment that takes the fun out of things. Self-discipline is a tool that trains you to move in the right direction and make the right decisions. Welcome it, see it as training, and see it as a necessity to the good life.
The easier and less painful option isn’t what moves you in the right direction and the easy route only takes you farther away from your goals and gets you into more trouble.
It’s impossible to get to where you want without self-discipline.
Going to bed at the right time, getting enough sleep, getting up early, avoiding laziness, avoiding unhealthy choices, eating better, and saying “no” to particular thoughts, behaviors, habits, and activities are not forms of punishment – they’re necessary training tools make you better, stronger, healthier, and more mature.
Develop a more mature mindset towards self-discipline and instead of placing a negative and “painful” frame around it, see it as a positive and constructive tool.
12. Be Responsible for Your Results
Admit when your results are your fault and don’t blame your life, circumstances, and results on some other person or thing. Have no problem raising your hand and saying, “Where I’m currently at in my life is my fault. I could’ve done a better job over the past few weeks/months/years and I can see the error in my ways. I will make the proper adjustments to avoid this happening again.”
It takes courage, honesty, and a deep sense of humility and self-respect to beat yourself up like that. It takes a lot to admit, “I’m not the smartest person and I’ve been messing up.” Even though it’s hard to do, it’s the mature thing to do. It’s the respectable and honorable thing to do.
13. Set Goals, Get To Work, Move Forward
Lose the “I’m not sure yet” answer to everything. Stop waiting for the “right time”, never taking action, never getting results, and then blaming it on other people and circumstances.
See the goal and take action – even if it’s a horrible time.
Develop the “doing something now is better than not doing anything” mindset.
Making goals, taking action, and continuous movement forward is maturity.
14. Welcome Criticism
Some people tell you everything they think you’re doing wrong but then when you make a suggestion on what they can do better, they don’t want to hear it.
Maturity is listening to criticism, taking it in, digesting it, and keeping what’s useful.
Stay open to criticism, feedback, and opinions and actually think about what is being said. Stop being selective on who you listen to – even if the person criticizing you has nothing going for themselves and has more work to do on themselves than you do. You’ll be surprised who can hit the bulls eye on where you’re screwing up.
Process the information, throw out what’s not applicable, and then take what’s useful into consideration.
15. Stop Reacting To Your Emotions
When it’s crucial to keep a calm and clear mind, emotions cloud your judgement and cause you to make the wrong decisions. When you look back on your decisions during times of high emotion, you realize you didn’t make the best choice in that moment because you were distracted by your emotions.
Instead of stopping and thinking about what they’re doing, immature people feel emotions and ride them like a wave. They don’t see a problem with the extreme highs and lows and how leads to horrible results. The more you respond to your emotions without stopping to think about it first, the more you risk appearing unstable, untrustworthy, and immature.
Realize that emotions prevent you from thinking clearly.
There’s a very good reason Special Forces teams are taught to suppress, stifle, and bypass their emotions in times of intense stress. Their emotions will cloud their judgement and put everyone’s safety in jeopardy. They’re taught not to react to what they’re feeling and to let it pass before making a decision – a process that has proven effective and beneficial to saving the lives of thousands of men and women.
16. React Vs Respond – Learn The Difference
Responding is stopping to think about what you’re going to do before you do it and reacting is taking action as a result of a thought or emotions without stopping to consider if it’s wise or not.
Reacting bypasses thinking. Responding implements thinking before taking action.
When you’re immature, you freak out and “react” to everything. When you’re more mature, you “respond’ by processing and “filtering” all incoming information and comparing it to experience, training, and knowledge. You decide to do what you deem is the most appropriate in that situation ONLY after running through all the scenarios and pro’s and con’s in your mind. As a result, you make more mature decisions no matter what’s happening.
Immature decisions are made when they’re thoughtless “reactions” to problems and situations. Mature decisions are well-thought out “responses” to problems and situations.
Stop reacting and start responding. When things happen, don’t do anything until you think about it first.
17. Stop Complaining
Complaining is uselessly pointing out problems and everything wrong with them instead of helping to come up with solutions to fix it.
Instead of bitching, whining, and complaining about what’s wrong in your life, your job, or certain situations, have solutions lined up before you ever open your mouth. If you can’t offer a solution to a problem, then just be quiet.
It’s pointless wasting time and energy complaining about what you can’t control or change.
When you’re tempted to complain, figure out if it’s within your control. If it isn’t, just deal with it and move on. If it is, then figure out possible solutions to it before you tell someone about it.
In the eBook and Audiobook Declare War on Yourself, this is called being “socially and verbally responsible”.
18. Become A Better Listener
It’s wise to learn when to zip it and just listen because there’s a lot of value in being a good listener.
When you’re talking, you’re not learning anything and not getting to know the other person better. You’re wasting your time. When you’re blabbing about yourself, you’re wasting the other person’s time as well.
When you’re a good listener, you’re making the other person feel special, understood, and important. You’re making them like you, even more.
Talking is not a necessary tool to make others like you more. Effective listening gains you the admiration and respect you’re looking for.
To become more mature, make an effort to become a better listener and others will respond to you better.
19. Quit Judging
When you’re silently judging people you’re failing to realize that everyone sees, filters, and interprets the world in their own way. Everyone has their own perspective. Your closed-minded and inexperienced way of seeing and doing things is not always correct and better.
Maturity is understanding everyone is different and has their reasons for the things they say, do, and feel.
It’s understanding that being different and seeing things “your way” doesn’t make you better.
To become more mature, become more open-minded to everything. Try seeing things differently. Try putting yourself in their shoes and seek to understand why their perspective or belief differs from your own.
99% of the time, although some ways may be better than others, depending on the situation, nobody’s way is the “perfect” way.
20. Remain Calm and Relaxed
When you’re immature, you’re always on edge, freaked out, worried, and anxious. The more mature you are, the calmer and more relaxed you remain when experiencing any form of stress. You’re able to “keep it together” and remain composed.
Remaining calm consists of knowing how to control your emotions, pick your battles, not let anything get under your skin. It’s knowing how to respond instead of react.
To become more mature, work every single day on being as calm as you can be in all situations.
In a time where most people are getting poor results by thinking and behaving in childish and immature ways, you can easily set yourself apart from them by choosing to become more mature and make more mature decisions. You can easily avoid immature predicaments and life kicking you around.
Maturity isn’t the easiest or most fun route to take, but it’s definitely the most rewarding.
No more immature BS. It’s time to grow, change, and get better results.
Thanks for reading,
– Marc Summers